Thursday, July 31, 2008

Of Health and Self-Pity

Remember how I listened to all of you loyal readers, friends, and family and I went to the doctor for my endless episodes of illnesses this year?

Well, I got the call yesterday; something isn't right. I'm not really going to go into much detail, because I don't know a lot yet. I just know that I have to go back on August 28th to have a biopsy done of some abnormal tissues, that were found. I honestly don't feel too uneasy in my heart, I feel calm and I feel like God is right here with me.

Andy said a beautiful prayer for me, last night, and I think that's where my calmness lays. He asked God to be with us, whatever the outcome may be, and that His will is carried out and that we will see HIM in this all.

I'm such a baby when it comes to my health. There, I said it. I don't like to address issues, I like to avoid even going to the doctor, and I pretend nothing is wrong when it really could be. When I actually succumb to my illnesses, then you know it's pretty bad. But once I do succumb, I tend to whine, sulk and go into the world of self-pity.

Today, is apparently no different. Last night, I didn't sleep one ounce. Last night, I sulked and stewed over the information I received yesterday.

For some reason, in my gut, I knew there might actually be something wrong with me so I tried to weasel my way out of every appointment, and then the doctor canceled one of the appointments, and that's when I knew something had to be wrong. Because that's how things work in my life, when they are put off it's usually because I don't want to hear the outcome.

I've learned something already: do not avoid situations! Whether I am afraid of the outcome or not, I need to learn to take better care of myself. Maybe, just maybe, learn to myself first for once! We'll see how long I keep this learned lesson! ;)

I'll keep you all updated.

Thanks for reading, friends!

26 comments:

jessicamarie12 said...

I'm right there with you! It's always easier to avoid health issues than to deal with them, but in the end it's always better to deal with them.

Reminds me of when I made my mom tell you I was going to have a spinal fusion because I didn't want to have to actually admit it to you :)

I think you have a good mindset. The fact that they are waiting until August 28 to do anything makes me think they are not TOO concerned... which is good!!

As hard as health issues are to deal with, they ultimately make us live healthier lives... definitely a blessing in disguise.

LYLAS!! ;)
Jessica

P.S. Jonathan and I saw Live on Tuesday night... Ed is still as hot as ever.. ;)

UDMom729 said...

I really hope it turns out to be nothing, but I'm very glad you are addressing this.

It's very hard to want what God wants for us instead of what we think we want, so I know what you mean and I will pray for His will in this situation also.

I hope God's plans for you do include more children someday because you are such a good mom!
You gotta take care of yourself for you and for your boys (Andy included!). I'm sorry you will have to wait so long for answers. Keep us updated.

My Goodness said...

Sorry to hear about your issue...I'm sorry you have to wait until the 28th to find out more.

I hope that you continue to let God be your comfort...

Take a nap today, friend.

Kami said...

My prayers are with you Brittany. Don't ignore it!

Thanks for visiting over at Elaine's, it's nice to meet you too :-)

Stacy said...

I am so sorry this has come up but I commend your faith in God. And good for you for not ignoring yuor health issues any longer! My prayers are with you :)

Kelli said...

Prayers and HUGS!

Amy said...

You are in my prayers!

Dawn said...

Thinking of you today. I'm glad you have Andy, your wonderful family, and God. Blessings & love to you.

Christina said...

My prayers and hugs are with you, Brittany. I know it's scary, but good for you for confronting it and not putting it off any longer. I have what's considered a life-threatening heart condition...and yet a lead a normal life. So even bad news doesn't necesarily mean your world will fall apart.

And? Feel free to whine to us all you want.

And, another hug. :o)

tricki_nicki said...

Oh, you don't need to feel uneasy, I'll do it for you! PLEASE keep us updated!

Sue said...

Did you talk to our favorite nurse? love you,

SJS

Maggie said...

My fingers are crossed for you...definitely keep us posted!

4 Little Men and Twins said...

I'm so sorry to hear... i'll be praying for you.

i'm here (on the couch) to talk if you want to. :)

brittany

Sara said...

Brittany! You are in my every prayer. my that's a long time to wait with this hanging over your head. I'll put you in our prayer box. Love you girl

Stacy said...

I will say a prayer for you, too, dear lady. I hope that everything turns out fine in the tests, but yes, getting checked out is very important!! I'm glad you finally got in. ((((hugs))))

Arizaphale said...

hmm.I will admit to being a teensy bit worried for you and I DON"T like it! I'll certainly put you in my prayers too. I love your outlook though. You are such a sensational gal and you have an amazing family around you to support you.......love ya xxxx

Blueberry said...

you will be fine because you are a strong person. and if you happen feel like you are weakening, you have a large group of strong friends and family waiting to hold you up!
i remember my biopsy and i know the hardest part is the waiting. the not knowing for sure is what does you in. try not to worry or stress (hard, i know!) keep your faith! and if you need anything please just let me know!
it WILL be ok!

cherish.photography said...

Prayers are headed your way.

Mandaroo said...

I believe in the postive power of positive thought and energy and am sending MUCHO postive thoughts & energy your way....you are such a sweet, positive person and deserve nothing less. I will be thinking of you!!

BAD said...

Sorry to hear you are not feeling well, i hope everything will come back ok. Make sure you take care of yourself, you have 2 boys (3 with your hubby) that love and depend on you so you need to address the issues not run from them. Of course this advice is comes from someone that doesn't care of himself like he should either.

Kathryn said...

Another thing we have in common. Avoidance.

My prayers are with you, girl!!!

Maya said...

I'm praying for you Brittany. Hopefully it's something small or nothing at all! You are so blessed to have a husband supporting and praying for you.

Our Family said...

Awwww...you will be in my prayers!! Hang in there and keep us updated!!!

God is in control :)

Nina said...

You are in my heart, thoughts, and prayers....

May everything turn out better than expected....God works so many miracles...one day I will share with you the one of my father's surgery...and how doctors from Texas and New Zealand were baffled....how "another hand was guiding theirs during surgery..."

Hugs going out to you....

Bradley's Mom said...

I will keep you in my prayers!

Lots of love to you!

xoxo
Linda

kim said...

Brittany, your in my prayers. I'll pray for you and your family for strength, comfort, and peace, no matter how this turns out.
Big hugs coming atcha.